my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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