Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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