Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Randomize
