I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Randomize
