Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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