and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Holy shit dude........stairs
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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