break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
I need a burrito and a hug.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Randomize