She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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