You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I checked into jail on foursquare
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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