ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
