I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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