I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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