IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
