Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
