He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
