Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
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