Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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