I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Randomize
