And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Randomize
