its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
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