if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
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