So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Randomize