So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
