remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
