Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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