people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
