Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
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