I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Help. Why am I so naked?
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