Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
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