Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
