you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
