the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Randomize
