Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
