Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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