This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
