So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
