Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
