im about as happy as oj after his trial
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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