He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Randomize
