I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Randomize
