Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
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