I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
