This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
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