you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Randomize
