I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize
