did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Randomize
