I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
