why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
Randomize
