Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Randomize