If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Randomize
